Wednesday, June 25, 2003

Local NSmen would find this extremely... nostalgic. Enjoy!

Hotel BMTC
*sung to the tune of Hotel California*

Down Seletar Expressway, cool wind in my hair
Warm smell from the cookhouse,
Rising up through the air
Up ahead in the distance, I saw a fluorescent light
Nee Soon Medical Centre
I had to stop for the night

There they stood in the doorway, my OC
And PC as well
I was thinking to myself
This can't be Heaven, this has to be Hell

And they opened the tonner, and they showed me the way
There were sergeants down that corridor,
I thought I heard them say...

Welcome to the Hotel BMTC
Such a garang place (such a garang place),
Such a garang face
Kena confine at the Hotel BMTC
All throughout the year (all throughout the year),
You can find me here

His mind was certainly twisted,
He had a sadistic bent
He had a lot of other PTIs he calls "friends"
Going round the parade square
Sweet summer sweat
Route march to remember,
Route march to forget

So I called up the OO,
I said "Sir, I want to die"
But he said, "We haven't had a suicide here since 1999."
And still those voices are calling from far away
Wake you up in the middle of the night
Just to hear them say

Welcome to the Hotel BMTC
Plenty of canteen breaks at BMTC
What a nice surprise (what a nice surprise)
Get your alibis

Lizards on the ceiling, houseflies in your eyes
We are all just prisoners here of the Army's device
And in the Specialists' Chambers, they gathered for the feast
They stabbed it with their plastic knives
But they just can't cut the beef

Last thing I remember
I was running for the door
I had to find a passage back to the place I was before
"Relac ah, brudder," said the RP, "until you ORD...
"You can book out anytime you like
But you can never leave!"

BMTC: Basic Military Training Center
Seletar Expressway: the road near Nee Soon BMTC Camp
Nee Soon Medical Center: Where we go to when we report sick
OC: Officer, Commanding. In charge of a company
PC: Platoon Commander
tonner: 3 tonner truck
garang: brave, courageous, often to the point of foolishness
kena: get
PTI: Physcal Training Instructor (people have DIED at their sadistic hands; this is no joke!)
route march: cross country march, with rifle, backpack, and all
OO: Orderly Officer
Faibee-Axe: 5BX, acronym for the 5 Basic eXercises
Canteen breaks: When we actually get to relax in between training
RP: Regimental police; the poorer, lousier cousins of the elite provost(BTW, I'm provost)
ORD: Operationally Ready Date; the day when we end our two plus years of military service.


Post a Comment

<< Home